Times

There are times for me when I do not write... they are my down times.... not times when I relax but times when I am feeling down, not feeling like my best self. I understand the importance of service and helping others but I am so tired sometimes...l. physically tired and I wonder if I cannot run faster than I have strength than what can I do?

I become selfish and wonder where are my light houses to look for.. and then they have been there the whole time but I was too busy being inward instead of paying attention to life happening around me. People love you they are always trying to reach out, its just not the people you would expect... Heavenly Father knows what we need more than we do. Trust in Him.

There are times

I don't know if the phrase "this too shall pass" makes me feel very good right now because right now... it sucks. Whether I am bummed by how I have been feeling lately. I thought I would be feeling better.

I do like this quote... The thing is... we are all working on something. Everyone is.

Prayer

The other night I was putting little man to bed and I asked him if he would say the prayer. He said that Heavenly Father would think that he was silly. I told him that Heavenly Father already knew his momma was crazy so it was ok if he was alittle silly, but it did not comfort him. What do we hold back on asking for or talking to our Father in Heaven for because we think its silly?
There are some times when my brain is so fried that I just say..... please understand the things that are hard to put into words right now because my head cannot wrap it around my heart.... and amazingly I feel at peace. These things may seem different but I think that there may be similarities too.
We are not going to be able to get a good relationship if we don't open the lines of communication through prayer and we also need to read our scriptures to receive the inspiration to know the answers. We also need to trust that our Heavenly Father loves us no matter what and we can trust in Him our thoughts, desires, needs, wants and have a conversation with him as we have with our own father here on earth. I am thankful that we can have our own prayers and I hope that we can be comfortable enough to pray without fear for the things that we feel that we want/need/desire in our lives.

Eight years ago

 Time has gone by so fast and cannot believe that it has been eight years since I was sealed to Karl... Its amazing that I have been blessed as much as I have. I have a wonderful family and I cannot ask for more.
 The temple has always been a place of refuge for me. A place of peace and comfort and I am so thankful that I have the chance to go back whenever  I want to feel it again and again.

This is a simple yet very profound statement to me. It is my sons favorite song. The words are:

I am a child of God
and He has sent me here.
Has given me an earthly home,
with parents kind and dear.

Lead me, guide me, walk beside me,
help me find the way.
Teach me all that I must do,
to live with Him some day.

“I Am a Child of God,” Children’s Songbook of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, 2–3

Each night we sing this and say prayers. There has been a time or two where I have asked him if he knows what it means and he doesn't comprehend it but it comforts him. I think that it comforts me as much as I can understand it. My comfort is mostly in the line "Teach me all that I must do, to live with Him some day." 
We all make mistakes, think that we know more than our Father in Heaven, but ultimately we have to learn to do what is right and we will be blessed for it. We are all at different places and we cannot judge another for where they are, they could be farther than us and we don't know it.. I am just thankful that I can apply the atonement in my life.

First and foremost

I have started other blogs and have lacked but as I was sitting in Relief Society today I got the impression that I needed, whether for myself or for someone else out there, to start this blog.   I spend a lot of time in my own thoughts and most of our own reflections of the world is our own perceptions. That is what this blog is. My own thoughts. I will quote the scriptures and the general authorities and even people close to me but the thoughts and reactions to their thoughts are mine and mine alone. 
I also will not argue. I accept everyone has their own thoughts as I have mine but my blog is not made for me to debate... Its made for me to have an outlet and if you so feel to read and respond, then I am ok, but if the direction does not feel uplifting I will not continue it.
Here is a little about myself. I was born into an LDS family. My father was raised in Utah and met my mother while working in a Radio Shack in 1976 in Pendleton, Or and they got married June 4, 1977. My mother is a convert to the church and my parent were sealed in the temple December 12, 1987. I am old enough to remember going and being a part of the wonderful temple ceremony and that has always been a blessing to me. My family growing up struggled with staying active in the church but when I was in Young Womens I went as much as I could and I took my little brother with me too. Little did he know he kept me going as much as I kept him going. I met some amazing people in the singles ward and we have become best friends throughout the years and I met my eternal companion there. In the middle of all that I also served a mission in the Oklahoma Tulsa Mission. I now have a wonderful husband and an amazing 5 year old son and my life has trials, like everyone else..... But Heavenly Father loves us all.